Monday, 31 December 2012

The Worst of 2012

They say that when it seems too good to be true, it probably is. This year prompted some pivotal fashion moments, but it also produced a slew of cringeworthy looks. Whip out the tissues, ladies and gents: here comes the worst of the worst. To ease the pain, I've decided to express my feelings through superlatives.

Most Ironic
Lena Dunham at the Emmy Awards:  I jut think it's really funny how she's so naked on Girls, yet she decides to borrow her grandmother's frock for the Emmys. Wait...that's Prada? Now I'm confused.(Photo)
Worst Pregnancy Outfit
Claire Danes at the Emmy Awards: Usually an angel on the red carpet, Danes' sunny number was a big disappointment. First of all, the silhouette is not flaunting her pregnancy curves. On the contrary, it looks like she ate an extra helping of pasta (and not in a good way). Not to mention the dress' blousing is as sloppy as Carrie Matheson's mental state. Maybe next year. (Photo)
Cheesiest Pageant Ensemble
Ashley Judd at the Emmy Awards: "This look is so awesome," said no one ever. I would love to meet the geniuses behind this piece of work and give them a nice talking to. (Photo)
Best Halloween Costume
Kirsten Dunst at the Met Gala: It's awkward because nobody told Fraulein Kirsten that this year's Met Ball Gala was not a Halloween party. (Photo)
Least Flattering
Anna Faris at the Academy Awards: We rarely see this funny lady on the red carpet. After this ensemble, I think we've been spared this whole time. Though completely sequined gowns sound lovely in theory, they're a nightmare in real life. Not to mention unflattering. Perhaps this look would've worked if Faris wasn't sporting a creepy bob. (Photo)
Most Confused
Hayden Panettiere at the Emmy Awards: Who knew that Marchesa could look so wrong? It's just way too much to handle. And painful.  (Photo)
Best Dressed... at a Middle School Dance
Kristen Wiig at the Emmy Awards: Well, this whole ensemble is awkward. The haltered top, the hunched shoulders...I need a paper bag to breathe into! The funny lady isn't a style guru, but it seems like her stylists went AWOL after she left Saturday Night Live. 'Tis a shame. (Photo)
Most Scandalous
Fergie at the Grammy Awards: There's a fine line between thought-provoking and trashy. Fergie crossed that line. And then some. Though Jean Paul Gaultier paired black underwear with this dress for the runway, it's an uncomfortable combination in real life. But the pain doesn't stop there: Fergie thinks it's a great idea to overdose on chunky jewelry. Please, make it stop! (Photo)
Worst Copycat 
Emma Stone at the Academy Awards: Remember how I said that Stone can pull off several different looks? Well this is not one of them. First of all, this is just too much red to handle. Secondly, Stone is clearly trying too hard. Instead of reliving Nicole Kidman's red carpet fame, this A-Lister should just be herself! (Photo)
Worst Use of Sparkly Jeans Since Limited Too
Brad Goreski at the American Music Awards:  Consider my respect for him as a fashion stylist gone. While I appreciate Goreski's love for going outside the sartorial boss, this is just horrific. (Photo)
The Worst Ever
Cyndi Lauper at the American Music Awards: It's been a few months, and I still have no idea how to properly react to this ensemble. While I understand  that Lauper has "rockstar" status, I don't think that gives her an excuse to forgo a nice pair of pants. Especially when she's that old. And what's with plaid sash-- is it even a sash? All I know is that this outfit makes me sad. (Photo)
Caused the Most Angst
Kim Kardashian at Cannes Film Festival: This ensemble made me so angry, I dedicated a whole blog post to this sartorial tragedy.  Don't make me rehash the ugly details.(Photo)
The Most Tropical (in the Worst Way)
Shailene Woodley at the SAG Awards: I'm still wondering why this happened. Anyone want to take a guess? Nope? Let's chalk it up to "taking a role too seriously." (Photo)

Perhaps all these victims can learn a thing from their mistakes. Here's to hoping! 


1 comment:

  1. You're just mean to these people. Not providing any insightful commentary, just bullying for no good reason. Most of the things you said didn't make sense and were just conjecture. Boring. Just goes to show that anybody can publish an article.